I always wanted to be closer to God. I have always prayed for it. In May 2010, I have decided to attend Sabbaths regularly. So I did for the past seven months and still going on. But God taught me that He's more into refining me through the experiences He allowed, than that of Bible studying. I know that's what He does, working in my life like in everybody else, giving us the desire to obey Him and the power to do what pleases Him.(Philippians 2:13)
I believe those two BIG instances that caused me heartaches recently were the keys that opened my maturity. I agree that you never know how strong you can be until it's the only thing you have left. I can say, because I know it. I know what it feels like having people you love leave. I know what it's like to be depressed. God knows how deeply hurt I am, how much I cried night after night for several weeks. And He keeps tract of my misery and puts my tears in His leather
container. (Psalm 56:8) He listens, so I have poured out my heart to Him. I have gone through it knowing that He has better plans; and in so doing, I have learned to be thankful for whatever the situation is. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, "in everything, give thanks."
The pain always lingers, and it's already a part of me which I have to live with every single day. And that's what's making me connected to the Father. Psalm 34:18 says, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, He rescues those who are crushed in spirit." Rick Warren wrote "your profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days--when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned,when you're out of options, when the pain is great--and you turn to God alone...and we learn things about God in suffering that we
cant learn any other way."
Psalm 105:4 is telling that we "Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His face evermore." I have chosen to seek God because I want Him in my life. And though I'm hard pressed on every side, I am not crushed; though I was perplexed, I wasn't in despair; persecuted but not abandoned' struck down, but not destroyed. (2 Corinthians 4:8,9) People who have seen me at my worst and still uttered the words "You are so strong!" barely knew that this is Christ's power made perfect in my weakness; that is in 2 Corinthians 12:9.
Ever since then, I am grateful in everything that has been happening in my life. I have considered it pure joy when I fall in all sorts of trials. I believe that I'm transformed by trouble, and it just made me much closer to Jehovah.
You see, I'm not saying that I have won the race already. I'm still on that same journey, but polished and renewed this time. My choice in wanting to be under God's yoke gave meaning and understanding in all crossroads, trials and difficulties in my life. That's why for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:10
No comments:
Post a Comment