all in a day's work!

D-Received pt. awake, lying on bed with mother at bedside, with patent IV D5IMB at the right hand running at 60 gtts/min, febrile with an initial temperature of 38.2, with chopped lips, no other complaints noted, on soft diet. A-am care done, v/s checked and recorded, I&O recorded, IVF regulated, kept patent, TSB done, paracetamol given by the MN, moistened lips with wet cotton balls, encouraged to increase fluid and food intake, attended needs, watched out for further increase in temperature, rechecked temp:36.8 @ 12nn, changed IV bottle same sol'n and rate @ 1pm, with temperature elevation of 37.9 @ 2pm, paracetamol given by the MN. R-left pt. asleep, still with patent IVF, still febrile, with dry, cracked lips, endorsed.

Off for my am shift at Manila Adventist Medical Center- Pediatrics. Here I am, obviously excited for today's challenge, I thought. Climbing up the stairs to the fourth floor wasn't yet torture. Having to brace myself of the toxic, color-coded charting or the provoked anger of our clinical instructor; or maybe assigned to an aloof and scared patient with a stoic parent wasn't a hard thing to do. I was prepared for any patient, I confidently believed. I've got good and therapeutic communication skills; I offer smiles from the heart, and is willing to do any job. I'm well in taking vital signs; I was complimented for my soft, alterative touch. Above all, I've got all these skills because I was, in the first place, blessed by God of it. I was armored.

After the endorsement, our clinical instructor assigned me to a 4 year old male patient who was diagnosed with Severe Viral Infections. In the above data, I received the patient awake and lying on bed. He has drowsy eyes, and in a languid mood. Rationalizing his diagnosis, I knew then that I need to monitor his temperature for the whole shift. So I introduced myself to the mother and the child, and got the initial temperature of 38.2; with the mother being the opposite of what I was supposing to mingle with minutes ago, she was very kind, smiling and jolly as she helped me place the thermometer on my restless patient's axilla. After a few minutes of preparing the basin half-filled with tap water, I did Tepid Sponge Bath to my now playful patient, as he leaped to me and whispered "angry birds," and pointed to his toy. Short term goal of lowering my patient's temperature was met.

The shift went on by taking vital signs, providing am care, changing of linens, playing with the patient, interviewing the mother. Until it came to the point when the mother asked me if i really liked nursing. Comes from a compassionate heart the answer, "opo. ito po kasi talaga yung hilig ko, di ko po kasi nakikita sarili ko sa ibang course. tsaka dito po ako masaya eh," She persuaded me to shift to an engineering course, because her two cousins who are now both registered nurses still have no jobs. What now, I asked myself. I smiled at her, and told her that I love interacting with people, I like being busy, and I know I can't do both sitting in front of the computer as an engineer in an air conditioned room for straight hours; or testing programs in the test floor, using tweezers to pick up microchips. I'd rather do toxic charting, attending to the needs of my patients,and using tissue forceps and clamps to pick up sterile instruments. I'd rather do the dirtiest jobs in nursing my patients and earn a little, than earn so much from what's not interesting me. She agreed then by telling me that "sabagay, nasa sayo din naman yun, kung gaano ka kasipag." I smiled at her sudden receptivity. Her son playing with my stethoscope frowned when I told him I need to get back to the nurse's station.

Ooooh, here comes what's making my muscles tense, my abdomen cramp, yay! am i having tachycardia? Bring it on!--my mind been stimulated, commanded my muscles, abdomen, and heart to relax. After having my sample charting checked, I was finally relieved. It wasn't toxic at all, I told my block mates. Ooooops. oooops, oooops oooooooops!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh NO.

Yay. With shaking knees, sweating palms, and feeling really hot, I showed our clinical instructor a very minor error, so minor it shouldn't even be committed. I graphed a 10am data to the 8am column. My "I.am.not.transferring.charts!" chant seems going a little quieter. ooops, again I thought, fighting back tears. uh-oh. Deep breathing, I said to myself. When our clinical instructor finally saw what mistake I had carelessly, maybe absentmindedly written down the chart, he opted not to shout at me; he opted not to shame me; he opted not to be mad at me; but I knew deep down he's disappointed, and as he speaks about what to do, I imagined smoke coming out of his ears like that from a boiling tea pot. Whooh... is that a smile I see? oh thank You Lord. It was! Lessons learned? Just stay positive. (haha,lame). My DAR charting was successful, at least. :)

My goal of maintaining my patient's temperature within the normal range wasn't met. Doctors still couldn't tell what's causing his fever. His mother's so anxious. I said goodbye to them, and left the pediatrics with a "phew, that was all in a day's work!"

GOD, I know You know how I felt. Thank You once again for using me this time in a way I wasn't expecting. You're so amazing. You never failed to make me smile. :)

Mood music + Amaya

Why would the rain invite my thoughts into thinking arbitrarily, like I have no choice? That's why notepads should always be somewhere in my bag, wherever I go. The thoughts tangled in my mind should be unraveled and should pass through my finger tips, to that very medium I am holding to write something, anything, everything!

Jim Brickman's music adds up to the sweetness of finally being able to smile at the thoughts I have. It's just a wishful thinking that I play his songs, since I'm no musician and is a self-proclaimed frustrated pianist.

How drawn am I to the rain, how I love hearing every splatter and every drop, how imaginative I can become when it starts pouring, how I hate people saying it's a hassle to them, how I associate it to any instrumental, soft music I listen to, how I would want to just lie down, relax my soul and meditate, how I become nostalgic, sentimental, and emotional when it comes down naturally, so beautifully. . . .is this just really me who feels this way?

The best spirit it gives me, is the fact that I am reminded of the good Lord. How bountiful His blessings are summing up to the total of the raindrops, double it, triple it even. Job 36:27, 28 says that "He draws up drops of water; they distill the rain into its mist, which the clouds pour down and shower on humankind abundantly." He never fails to make me feel important, never fails to tell me how much worth I have, never fails to let me know that all the things I have right now didn't cross my life accidentally, and all are blessings to be thankful for. He's a Father, we all should forever praise and tell others about-our Creator, One who sent His Son to give us salvation as a gift we can grab through faith. Exodus 33:14 states that the Lord said "My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest." How great of an assurance that can be, if we would just truly believe in it, and trust Him?

Carpe Diem

It's been two months since I last blogged, and obviously I missed it. Been very busy with school, so much stress I have that I even envy those who have longer free times than I do. Cue that I'm doing this instead of my requirements. I was battling with myself as to whether I stop blogging for some time, and focus on the things I have to do, but then I thought that either way, I would do what I love.

Been exposed in the delivery room for the past two weeks. To a person like me, who treasures her "firsts," surely my first actual duty will always be remembered. "Actual, sterile gloves,dali!," prompted my clinical instructor. Excited yet panicking, I donned my sterile gloves in less than 10 seconds! Imagine the adrenaline flushing through my veins. Back in first year, we were taught that putting on the sterile gloves requires speed and technique, that you can actually wear it in 3-5 seconds. Of course, I didn't believe that, because when it was my time to do it, I finished in more than 30 seconds. That's why donning the sterile gloves for 10 seconds in the DR is an achievement, believe me. Ok, so back to the scenario. When the bag of water was finally ruptured, I knew right then and there that the newborn would come out. . .labor pains. . .mother pushing. . .crowning. . .head out. .got ya! Scared that I might break the fragile neck, afraid to show jitters and very nervous that I was, I pulled the newborn out rationalizing in my mind what I was doing. Praise God for the successful pull. Then I placed the neonate on the mother's abdomen, assisted in the cutting of the cord, and waited for the delivery of the placenta. Gosh I thought, did I just do that. Seeing the little angel I had my first encounter with and thinking what if I had gone wrong in the procedure. . .what if I dropped her or something, killed her with my shaking hands. . . .BLAH. I dropped the paranoia, and reveled on the wonder of how courageous mothers can be as they take the risk of delivering their babies.

Truly mothers endure so much of the changes from the start of their pregnancy to the moment they give birth. John 16:21 states that "A woman, when she is in labor, has sorrow because her hour has come; but as soon as she has given birth to the child, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world." What I will always remember is that a mother had to endure the pain she needs in order to get her child out of her womb. And a mother, without strength will find it much more difficult to deliver her baby.

One thing I'm pointing out is that Christ's power is stronger when we're weak. For sure He is with the mother as she pushes her baby out; He is with the midwife as she performs her task; and I am 100% sure that He was with me as I pulled the newborn out.

In times like this that I got all my requirements piling up next to me, I will always think of giving up. But then seeking the Lord for strength will give me much more than the energy I need to finish all, because He gives me time to really appreciate what I have to do. Nursing is my passion--NCP making that would end up "hemorrhagic" due to the many corrections the clinical instructor would require using her red pen; a community book to finish; a lot more requirements, and having to worry about not being able to review for the exams because I will be even busier--these all come with it, and I have to have passion in completing everything.

24 hours in a day seem too short for all the paper works I have to finish, but with God to sustain me strength, wisdom, patience and determination, I can and I will be through with it. Best part? carpe diem.

HIHIHI =) i love Him.super.super.super.

HAHAHAHA. tonight, i am just so random. i had this unbelievable urge to study...so i got my fundamentals of nursing volumes 1 and 2 books, my health assessment book..read, memorized, and took down notes. Father, ganto po ba ang nanyayari sa mga mabubuting bata? hahaha, AY LAB YOU PO.sobra. sana lahat ng mga kaibigan ko, kahit mga di ko kilala eh ganto ka-feeler mag aral.even more. at least my benefits, di po ba? nako Lord, salamat po sa buhay kong to.kahit po sa buhay ng lahat ng mga taong mahal at kilala ko. ang bait bait Niyo po.pano ba makabalik ng utang ng loob. Kayo na po bahala saken, basta mag papagamit lang po ko sa Inyo.yes! exciting.hahaha! :) salamat po, grabe.salamat lang po talaga. :) eh ayun.feel ko magtagalog. kaya ito:

ansaya ko lang, alam mo yun..ung tipong napapangiti ako kasi sa crisis, actually plural, kaya crises eh...un nga, despite being in these situations, i still manage to have a sit & relax and ponder on God's promises. grabeeee! i can really feel Him working in my life. sobrang felt ko presence Niya, almost tangible. Ewan, sarap sa pakiramdam ng may Diyos. grrr.bat ba ang daming mga taong hindi makontento sa anong meron sila. sabi nga sa text: "if you've got God, you've got Everything you need." mahirap bang intindihin yon? haaay! Father, please use me to make You be known to other people...in whatever ways.pleeeaaase! in Jesus' name.Amen. edi ba ansaya mabuhay ng may peace of mind kahit anong hirap ng sitwasyon. naman oh!! faith in action men.please naman, magpagamit ka sa Diyos. nako, i tell you. ansaya!!! :)


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! i love the feeling.sana ganto lagi ^^, eh, hindi lang saken.pero sa lahat.LAHAT!!:) wee.

in the idle hours of the night. . .

Just finished reading the first fifteen chapters of Job. Truly it is comforting and motivating to know that a man like Job endured adversity. I pray that everyone will be like him when tested by trials.

In my present condition, I have learned to know my God even more. I remember a fact pointed out by the speaker at church several Sabbaths ago: "The more we know God, the more we trust Him; and the more we trust Him, the more we seek Him."

In my more-than-a-year of Bible self study, I have known my God maybe not completely, but more than enough to mold myself into the person I am today. Through the dreadful experiences He allowed to come to my life and my family's, I have felt Him working in my life.

And I admit through those experiences, I have been playing chess with the devil, too. He works his ways to put me down and many times do I lose and almost give up. But I let the hands of the Almighty handle; still in my sinful nature, maybe not win against the devil, but standing up after every fall. The game's not over anyway.

I honestly don't know how to thank God for refining me into someone responsible. I feel like I am not a good child to Him. I have always been asking Him to use me, make me wise and give me strength. It has been a prayer to at least direct one lost soul to God, through my efforts, by His grace, His power and His will. And if this happens, surely it will continue all the days of my life. I just want to give back everything to Him and I feel I haven't given much yet.

And with this crisis going on in my life, passing through the hole of the needle in my every day struggles, I can confidently say my God is with me. And what more can I offer, but my service and my life for Him and others.

That's why I'm thankful for the heartbeats and for the breaths each person I know takes, it means that God isn't finished with them too.

I believe this is the turning point of my life: to know God. Because knowing who He is, is already discovering my purpose.

Little shake is Enough

It was midnight, and I was chatting with a friend. I told her I'm loving her statuses on facebook, and she said she needs strength from Him. So I gave her a link of a blog spot which I think will help her. She mentioned about the devil making people weak because of our sins. I then told her that the devil is working on his target--and that is our weaknesses. Then she thanked me for sharing her the blog spot and told me that the Lord is enlightening people through me. I smiled when I realized God is using me. Later on, I felt my bed shake and I heard my guitar hanging on the wall move. I didn't mind it. But I was a bit scared, so I went out the room and checked for anything else hanging--like the keys, the cellphone chargers, the earphones--they were all moving. With the sight, I felt my heart pounding. So I immediately kissed my parents sleeping soundly in their room.

I went back to chat with this friend, and I told her there was an earth shake. She laughed because she thought her roommate was just uneasy, and then she confirmed that she felt it too.Then she told me that it's weird that just a while ago, we were talking about our problems and now talking about denying the little shake we both felt. We then thought how mysterious God's ways are, it was like through the earthquake, we were both shaken up as well to remember "Children, Never will I leave you;never will I forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5). Then once again she thanked me because she felt God shaking her through my confirmation that it did shake literally. She said I was God's instrument tonight.

I just can't let it pass without writing it. I'm so much perceptive with little things, and maybe it's God's way too, to shake me and tell everyone that He's everywhere and He's real. You don't wait for a massive earth shake before you come to Him. He's waiting for you. Feel Him all the time, and in that way, you will never have to worry about anything. Oh, and let me include. While you still have time, show them how much you love them.

Why Nursing?

Well, i have a dream. :)

SOMEDAY, I will be a nurse. IF not a nurse in the near future, then in the world to come. You see, a lot of people are discouraging me and telling me to shift courses, still be in a medical field but not nursing. There are 287,000 unemployed registered nurses in the Philippines alone,reported in the news. I thought that not everyone gets no job after calling themselves Registered Nurses. I want to be a nurse because I'm after the skills; I'm after the service I can render in the end times. See, it's true that my school, Adventist University of the Philippines trains students for eternity. Nursing is more than just the dollars abroad. My mindset is just to help regardless of the minimum wage, or even not being paid at all. If my patients suffer, I'm willing to sacrifice too. If my patients can't pay the bills, then I'm willing not to be paid, too. If you ask me where to live or where to get food without pay, I don't know. What I do know, one hundred percent is that God will provide.

Another dream is to write. Actually, it's to be a photojournalist. But to be one, I have to finish a degree. I don't know what that is as of the moment, but I'd like to pursue it someday too. If I get to be a successful nurse, and I've earned enough money to support my own; then I'm going to travel. Travel to different places, do missionary works, meet people familiar or unfamiliar, work with people of the same interest and love for service,experience different cultures, nurse a lot of people in need, photograph events,people or situations, write about all of it. It would be wonderful to have it all written not just an evidence of my journey, but a reading testimony of my work for the Lord.

1 Corinthians 15:58 says, "Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain."

If these two BIG dreams happen as a result of my faith and hard-work, I'd be one of the happiest,and most contented person on earth. I promise to use my wealth for His work; because He wouldn't have given it to me purposelessly. It would be the point of my existence, to be used by God in all ways I am capable of; and by His Omnipotence, even those I cannot do. This will be everything for His glory.

Facing Trials

Facing Trials? It's nothing compared to His suffering. Ponder on Isaiah 53:5 "But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon Him, and by His wounds we are healed." Would this wonderful fact stop you from moving forward? Of course, not. This is what matters most. This is why we live. so DON'T QUIT, because HE didn't.

You may be suffering from an illness; or you may be agonizing because of an incurable sickness.You may be homeless. You may have no job. You might have slept all nights with a hungry stomach,and you might have worried where to find luck the moment the sun rises again. You may be not educated. You may be abused. You may be bothered by your conscience. You may be worrying and doubting so much. You may have lost your house and all your possessions. You may be a victim of a natural calamity, a disaster, or terrorism. You may be confused. You may be behind bars. You may be stuck in poverty. You may think that there's no more hope. You may feel like everything is wrong. You may be in the midst of violence. You may be alone. But THINK.

Everything on earth is temporary anyway. ALL these things or circumstances shall come to pass. It goes on, no matter what. Time is running and all these will come to an end.

JUST REMEMBER, that in facing all trials, stand firm and strong in your faith. By doing so, you will be a living testimony of Christ. In all your actions and all the works you do, include Him. The hope is in Him, because He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

David didn't come to the battlefield unprepared, and he fought Goliath with his armor. We, also should be prepared. And in the tough future, the uncertainty, the end times where people of different powers will try to rule, remember to:

EPHESIANS 6:10-17.

"Finally, be strengthened in the Lord and in the strength of his power. Clothe yourselves with the full armor of God so that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world rulers of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavens. For this reason, take up the full armor of God so that you may be able to stand your ground on the evil day, and having done everything, to stand. Stand firm therefore, by fastening the belt of truth around your waist, by putting on the breastplate of righteousness, by fitting your feet with the preparation that comes from the good news of peace, and in all of this, by taking up the shield of faith with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. "


You may be suffering now, but all these will be rewarded once you endure the persecution with a steadfast faith in God. It will be more than a great feeling to tell yourself: "I have competed well; I have finished the race; I have kept the faith! Finally the crown of righteousness is reserved for me. The Lord, the righteous Judge, will award it to me in that day – and not to me only, but also to all who have set their affection on his appearing" (2 Timothy 4:7,8). Wouldn't it be a relief to hear our God tell us, "...Well done My good and faithful servant!..."(Luke 19:17).

Facing trials is not easy as how I want it to be, but in Him alone do we find strength to get through all of it. Sacrifice is not part of life, it is in fact our life. But it is for Him, so it is worth it. Be wise and stay strong. TRUST in God and do your best--it's the only way to make yourself at peace amidst the life's hardest and strongest storms.

No, it's not april fool's day.

Today, I was saved from a fractured jaw bone...

no, a dislocated bone or a lost limb...

no! a crashed face and body...

ah no, saved from a smash...

car saved from a wreck...

no..I'm not fooling around.

Today, I was saved from my demise.

When I was going out of Laguna Belair Subdivision, towards the intersection, mama said since I'm the first car to go, I don't need to hurry. I will not be beating the red light. So when the signal light to the left turned green, I drove carefully and slowly bearing in mind mama's reminder. Little did I know, a rushing ambulance counter flowed, took the lane I was about to enter. Cars from the opposite side surely anticipated a head on collision between me and the said ambulance. More Adrenaline caused me to apply sudden brakes; and all I did was whisper "Thank You,Lord" in my mind and prayed that the soul in the ambulance will be saved just as how the good Lord spared me and mama from what could have erased us from earth...or at least erased our faces.

Paul was not fooling around when he said, "For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38,39)

Most importantly, God is not fooling around when He said, "Don’t be afraid, for I am with you! Don’t be frightened, for I am your God! I strengthen you –yes, I help you –yes, I uphold you with my saving right hand!" (Isaiah 41:10)


Lessons learned?

I say life can end in just a split second and before you know it, you might be pleading for the so called "second life" as you battle with death. It is completely,surely, undoubtedly one hundred percent crucial to pray before going on through the day's activities. Thanking Him for His presence is enough, how much more thanking Him for guarding and guiding you all your life. God is good. Believe me. Believe in His immeasurable power to save lives and once again remind you that
"I'm not yet finished with you, child."

It's human to fret

" See, sometimes I worry a lot."

The moon is red tonight, and it's raining;sending me chills running through my veins. It made me worry, kind of, in a sense that a danger might come in a minute; or before I know it, the ground is shaking. That's what's wrong in me. See, sometimes I worry a lot. I worry of not seeing a loved one, or a person I care about. At the back of my head, something's yelling "be careful, there's an earthquake!!!" I fear that a single branch of a tree will fall down and land on a person's head, or mine. Sometimes, I worry an ant will not survive in the strong rain, or a stray dog will be smashed in the between the road and wheels. It's just that little things make me worry too, and I don't like it.

WOW, just after typing the above paragraph, a friend of mine sent a group message saying "WORRYING IS AN INSULT TO GOD." God does know how to send the right message at the right time, through a friend, you know. Okay, so back to what I am saying. Maybe it's not worry, but paranoia? HAHAHA. I don't know. But this wrong thing in me is part of who I am. Take for example my experience with my grandmother. The day before she was admitted at the hospital was the day I last heard her voice. The last thing she said to me is just a word, a powerful word I still hear in my mind whenever I think of her--"AYLABYU." And that's what I do. I always leave people with a kiss, or a smile and always have to say a loving word for them; it's because I always think that that time would be our last encounter. As the song goes, "We only got 86,400 seconds in a day to turn out all around or to throw it all away. We gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say, gotta live like we're dying."

Taking in the positive view, having to worry means you're concerned about something or someone; but it's not always good. Because it's true that it takes away the time you'll never get back, and it's useless to spend it worrying. The best way to at least get it off your head is to start the day by praying. Lifting everything to God through prayers is by all means perfect. At least in my case, I am always reminded not to worry--like that of the text message I just received. Having God to depend on in times of fear is one of life's greateast assurance of safety. Genesis 15: 1 says, "Do not be afraid." I'm just doing whatever it takes to protect someone or something, and the best way is to pray...








Then again the moon is red tonight and it's raining...it made me write this.